Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Golf. A Four Letter Word.

I hit the golf course tonight.
Frightening.
I do not remember being this bad
my first time out last year.
It was like I forgot how to swing.
If there was sand, my ball found it.
If I would have made it
through more than 4 holes
& got near the water,
my ball would have found that too.
I was hesitant to get lessons.
I'm calling the lesson gal
first thing tomorrow.
If I'm going to do something,
I want to be good, er, mediocre at it.
I really don't want to have to quit golf.
All my friends do it,
& husband would be so disappointed.
Husband is convinced
my crappy game
has something to do
with my cheap golf clubs.
Yeah, yeah, that is probably the problem.
And what happens
when I take the lessons,
get the new clubs
& still stink worse than a pile of dung?
I know, I need to relax.
It was only my first night out.
Lots of time to improve.
But I guess if I don't
at least I'll still have my hot a$$.
Oh, and don't you love the wig?
I wear it so when I hit
the house on hole 6
& break their kitchen window,
they have no idea it is me.

2 comments:

Our Family said...

You look lovely in this picture. Nice butt.=)
I know your frustration about golf. I joined league last year and I stunk it up. But I like to play. I find if you drink enough, almost anything is fun.
Hey - what other books have you read?? Looking for something good now that I have no vampires to worship after!

knittingknirvana said...

I agree with your husband--it is sooo the cheap clubs. :) You could play me and then you would look really good!! I started golfing after I met my husband. I haven't golfed since I got pregnant, but I have to say I really want to be good at it. Some day I will take lessons and I will be great!!